Being appalled and trans

Hi Shinita,

It sounds like our exchange is coming to a close. I’m fine with that. I just want to respond to a few points you make:

Some black people agree that sometimes the best way for non-black racist people to understand their racism is for other non-black people to school them on the topic.

The same goes for people who are not trans. It’s important for people like me to speak up on behalf of trans people because I am an ally. Does that make me someone qualified to speak for every trans person? Of course not.

Trans people, generally, are just as diverse in their opinion as they are in their state of trans-ness. It’s ridiculous to think that somehow I’m speaking for trans people. I speak up on their behalf because sometimes that has more influence.

So I have an idea of what I’m talking about. I also have a metric shit-ton of awareness about how the universe works and where people come from. Which is why I challenged you about your belief in “God” and the (inaccurate) claims you make from that belief.

Of course my opinion about transness would upset some trans people. That doesn’t make what I share inaccurate. It just means those who are upset don’t understand what I do, or have different opinions. No harm no foul there.

The reason the trans people you know agree with you is the reason anyone can find people who agree with them: You are creating your reality. That includes the people in your life.

So of course you’re going to have trans people who agree with you. That’s totally logical from what I know.

I also know trans people who will agree that transwomen are not the same as women. I agree with much of that sentiment. I know trans women are MORE than women in many cases. Aboriginal civilizations knew this as well, which is why some of them venerated them.

Which is why I agree with you that bathrooms should not be designated “mens” and “womens”. Those two ideas are completely false, made up bullshit. Made up by MEN who believed in the same god you do, then tried forcing that bullshit on all of us. Including black people (your ancestors and mine) who knew better.

I’m glad we’re moving away from that bullshit.

If I were trans, I’d be appalled by what some trans people do too. I’m positive there are trans people appalled by what trans people do because I dated such a person. She stayed far away from the trans community because much of what it represents repulses her. So I get that.

“Assigned a gender at birth” as I have said is an inaccuracy. But really, it’s not trying to state a fact. What it attempts to do is differentiate something people currently have no words for. That’s all it is. It’s no use arguing about that.

You (and everyone else having a problem) will sooner or later come to understand the majority of the kerfuffle is about people thinking there are only two genders. There are an infinite number of them. Everyone will remember this after death, when they let go of their preconceptions and see what’s really going on. Some get it before death. Some must learn after death, which is perfectly fine.

No, I wouldn’t say that. I would say have their right to their opinion, as everyone does. I would add, again, that the problem isn’t who is using the bathroom, it is how we’ve designated bathrooms.

Your arguments show that. Bathrooms were created “men” and “women” under silly, inaccurate assumptions. Transwomen making such arguments aren’t wrong or confused about their opinion as to who should or shouldn’t use the bathroom. They don’t understand how bathroom segregation started. If they knew, they might hold different opinions.

What I’ve done is write an article on Medium. I didn’t force you to read it. I didn’t force you to respond. How on earth are you thinking I’m forcing you to accept anything? This is yet another place where you’re incorrect.

I don’t expect you to accept that though. Because you see the world (and people in it) as being able force things on you and others. You’re doing the creating. You came to my article. You read it. You responded to it. No one forced anything on you. No trans person. And certainly not me.

You can hold onto all the distorted notions you care to and call them “truth”. As I’ve said a number of times here on Medium: you can lead a person to wisdom, but you can’t make them think (different).

You’re always going to find evidence supporting any claim you make, Shinita. A claim is how people create their reality.

I’ll only say in closing that the examples you give of transwomen harming others are infinitessimal compared to the number of trans people simply living their lives trying to enjoy freedoms they have by right of existing…all around the world and throughout history. There will always be “bad apples” doing things that spoil it for the rest. That includes the white community, the black community…in every community. That doesn’t make the rest of the community members equally bad.

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